


The Misadventures of A Piano Cat

by koalala1031



Category: New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Alternate Universe - Non-Despair, Animal Transformation, Cat, F/M, Fluff, Magic, No Spoilers, Rated T for swearing, Romantic Fluff, Suspension Of Disbelief, Transformation, blame Kaito and Miu
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-01
Updated: 2017-08-08
Packaged: 2018-11-07 11:56:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,228
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11058444
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/koalala1031/pseuds/koalala1031
Summary: Thanks to Himiko’s magic spell, Kaede turned into a cat.





	1. Goddamnit Ouma

**Author's Note:**

> Also available on Tumblr: http://mysterious-matcha.tumblr.com/post/160441473931/the-misadventures-of-a-piano-cat-masterlist

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also available on Tumblr: http://mysterious-matcha.tumblr.com/post/160086298356/the-misadventures-of-a-piano-cat

Kaito couldn’t believe what he saw.

He saw a Persian cat with golden fur that was cowering on the floor. The cat seemed to be scared and nervous. He wouldn’t suspect the cat to be Kaede if it wasn’t for her signature purple eyes and her cowlick being present on it. And most of all, Kaede’s clothes are discarded on the floor, proof that they stayed to their original size while she herself shrunk.

“Okay Ouma, what did you do this time?!” he scolded Kokichi.

“Eeeeh?!” Kokichi heaved. “It wasn’t me, it was Yumeno-chan!!”

“Nggghhh....!” Himiko grunted. “Ouma-kun started it...!”

“Hhhhhhh......” Kaito made a heavy sigh. “Tell me what happened, you two!”

Being intimidated by Kaito’s creepy moon-face, Himiko then started explaining. “I was reading this magic book... and then I found this spell that can turn people into cats... at least according to that book...

“So I told her that she should try that spell on Akamatsu-chan,” Kokichi continued. “I was _really_ sure that Yumeno-chan wouldn’t actually turn Akamatsu-chan into a cat. Since Yumeno-chan isn’t really a ma—uh, I mean she “doesn’t have enough MP” .”

“I did what he said because he called me a fraud. He said that if I was a real mage... I would’ve been able to turn Akamatsu-san into a cat...”

“I was joking tho. Pffft.”

“And you guys didn’t expect Akamatsu to actually turn into a cat?” Kaito replied them.

“No...” Himiko answered under her breath, but still clear enough for Kaito to hear.

“Or did we? Nishishi~” Kokichi teased, but Kaito straight up karate-chopped his head.

“Awwwh!!! What the hell, Momota-chan?!” the smol guy protested.

“ _I_ should be the one saying that. At least be grateful that my chop isn’t as strong as Chabashira’s.”

“You should’ve chopped Yumeno-chan as well. I mean she’s the one who chanted the spell.”

“She did it under _your_ coercion.”

Kokichi pouted at them, hoping that Kaito would at least do justice to Himiko. Yet his attempt was futile.

“WHAT HAPPENED TO KAEDE?!!!” Rantarou barged in to the library as he smashed through the door. Behind him was Saihara shocked at his violent attitude.

“A, Amami-kun please calm down...” Saihara was stuttering.

“Seriously, Saihara,” Rantarou glanced at the emo boy behind him. “You’re the one who told me that something happened to Kaede, so of course I rushed here.”

“Yeah, but—”

“ ‘Kay, so what did Ouma-kun do this time?” Rantarou immediately switched his focus to the two purple boys and the little red witch.

“Wait, me?!” Kokichi was pissed. “Really, Amami-chan?! You just got here and you instantly accused me as the culprit?!!”

“But isn’t that the truth?” Rantarou replied him, half-challenging.

“But, but,” Kokichi stuttered, putting up a sad puppy face to make the others pity him but to no avail. Kokichi then started crying, but the others didn’t react anyway.

“Seriously Ouma-kun, that trick of yours is already an old hat at this point,” Rantarou shrugged. “So Momota-kun, what happened to Kaede?”

“Basically, Ouma made Yumeno chant a spell that turned her into a cat.”

“...what?”

“No seriously,” Kaito tried to calm him down. “See her for yourself if you don’t believe me.” He pointed at the golden Persian cat, still cowering on the floor.

Rantarou had mixed feelings when he found out that his girlfriend was turned into a cat. He didn’t believe the cat used to be a human girl he’s been dating with for a while—and a cute one too. He was also astonished by how adorable that cat was.

Out of curiosity, Rantarou poked Kaede’s nose. Kaede rolled into a fluffy fur ball, facing the floor. “Honey, it’s me,” he whispered to her ear while petting her head. Kaede looked up at her boyfriend with sad kitty face.

Rantarou, of course, couldn’t resist those eyes of hers. “You’ll be fine, okay?” he said to reassure Kaede, as he cradled her in his arms. “So Yumeno-san, do you know how to break the spell?”

“Uh...” Himiko hummed. “I think I should check the book...”

Himiko then skimmed through the pages of the “How to Do Transformation Magic 101” book on the table. She opened the same page where she found out about the spell in the first place. And yes, the way to break the spell was right on the next paragraph. “The spell will automatically undo in 12 hours, it says...” she quoted from the book.

“Which means Akamatsu will be back into normal by roughly 3am tomorrow,” Kaito thought. “Good. We don’t have to ask for Yonaga’s help for her occult shenanigans or whatever, then.”

“Automatic? That’s underwhelming...” Kokichi in the other hand, was unhappy. “I thought it needs True Love Kiss or something. Pretty sure Amami-chan wouldn’t say no to it.”

Rantarou slightly smirked, but he held it to prevent Kokichi from teasing him even more.

“But isn’t 12 hours too long?” Saihara felt uneasy. “I mean, what should we say to Akamatsu-san’s parents?”

“That’s Amami-chan’s business!” Kokichi cheered the rest of the crew up. “He’s her boyfriend, so of course he can contact them without being suspicious!”

“How about the rest of the class?” Saihara asked again.

“The truth,” Kaito cut off the conversation. “This isn’t the first time Ouma fucks shit up, after all.”

“Why only me?! You know Yumeno-chan is technically also involved, right?!”

“Yumeno is genuinely sorry for her mistake, so I’m not mad as much. But you—”

“Guys, cut it out!” Rantarou finally spoke up. “I’ll just tell Kaede’s parents that she’s having a sleepover in Shirogane-san’s place.”

“And of course Shirogane should know the truth so she’ll cooperate,” Kaito added.

“And also Chabashira-san...” Himiko said. “So she can kick Ouma-kun’s butt...”

Kokichi remained speechless hearing what Himiko said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tried to write a multi-chapter fic this time ayyy. Sorry not sorry for the shitty title. But anyway, I hope you enjoy this fic and feel free to leave some feedbacks ^^ not forcing btw.


	2. Kitty Dress-Up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also available at http://mysterious-matcha.tumblr.com/post/161814322491/the-misadventures-of-a-piano-cat

“KYAAAAA SHE’S SO FLOOFY!!!!!” Tsumugi was hysterical the first time she saw the golden fur Persian cat. She snatched the poor feline from Rantarou’s hand and hugged her tightly. Tsumugi then lifted Kaede up above her head and started singing, “IT’S THE CIRCLE OF LIIIIIFE!!!”

Kaede however, didn’t seem too happy with Tsumugi’s treatment.

“Guess taking her to stay at Shirogane-san’s place isn’t the best idea, after all...” Rantarou sighed, regretting his choice.

“And whose idea is that?!” Kokichi snarled. “And everyone keeps blaming _me_ when something goes wrong?!”

“What?!” Rantarou replied. “I didn’t expect Shirogane-san to get _everyone_ to come!”

“...Can I go home now...?” Himiko asked weakly. Himiko and Maki both seemed unenthusiastic to be there.

“Gonta wants to hold her too!” Gonta said passionately, contrary to the two girls. “Maybe Gonta can talk to cats like he talks to insects!”

“Wait you can _actually_ talk to bugs?!” Kokichi was shook. “Like, having actual conversations with them? For real?!”

“Yes!” Gonta answered. “Gonta has always been friends with all the animals in the forest ever since he was a child. Gonta always talks to them, so he also understands their language.”

“Oh, good one. Guess you can translate what Akamatsu-chan says, then.”

“Yes!”

In the other hand, Tsumugi was still playing around with Kaede. “I wonder if I should dress her up with some cosplay~”

“Um, about that...” Rantarou tried to interfere. “Maybe you should ask if she’s okay with it or not.”

Tsumugi wasn’t even listening—she brought Kaede to the bathroom and started giving her some shower, ignoring her angry meows that sounded more like roars. Then she dried her fur with a towel. After Tsumugi was done, she brought Kaede to the dressing room where everyone else was waiting.

“Uh, Shirogane-san...” Rantarou tried to tallk his way, but Tsumugi was still too busy grooming Kaede. She untangled Kaede’s fur with a wide-toothed comb and continued drying her fur with a hair dryer.

“You should use the lowest heat setting,” Ryouma told Tsumugi. “If you set the heat too high, she might get over-heated.”

“Oh, thanks for the advice, Hoshi-kun!” Tsumugi replied as she lower the heat setting for the hair dryer.

“Also you’ll need to clean up the messy fur later,” Maki added while cleaning some of Kaede’s fur. “She’s shedding all over the place.”

“Yeah, that’s exactly why I’m not too fond of Persian cats,” Ryouma replied her. “Russian Blue however, is my personal favorite.”

“Toujou-chan will take care of it, don’t worry~” Kokichi replied as he attempted to lean down on Himiko’s lap only for Himiko to avoid him and hide behind Tenko.

“Gonta didn’t know that Hoshi-kun is so knowledgeable about cats!” he complimented the little guy.

“It’s nothing, really,” Ryouma shrugged. “I have a few at home, so I just learn things about cats from books and such.”

“But Gonta still wants to learn from Hoshi-kun! Is that okay?”

“Yeah, whatever.”

Meanwhile, Kirumi had been serving peppermint tea to everyone else.

“...Thank you.” Maki awkwardly replied to the maid as she and a few others started drinking.

“Nishishi~” Kokichi giggled while mixing his tea with some grape panta he prepared beforehand.

“OUMA WHAT THE FUCK?!!!” Kaito was shook.

“Why on earth would you mix tea and soda?!” Saihara was also shook.

“Because I can~” Kokichi answered the shook guys with a sly grin.

“Amami-kun, Shirogane-san, Gokuhara-kun, if you are done, the tea is on the table,” Kirumi told them. “I also served a bowl of milk for Akamatsu-san.”

“Thanks, Toujou-san,” Rantarou replied her without taking his eyes off of Kaede and Tsumugi.

Tsumugi was still busy grooming Kaede. She applied some makeup on her, such as mascara, eye shadow and some blush. Unlike when taking shower, this time Kaede seemed less rebellious. _She probably has passed her denial phase_ , Rantarou thought.

After giving her some makeup, Tsumugi put a tiny pink ribbon on her ahoge. Then she put Kaede in front of a mirror on the dresser. “So what do you think?” she asked, expecting a positive feedback.

Kaede was awed when she saw her own reflection on the mirror. “Beautiful, right?” Tsumugi asked again.

“I’d say yes...” Rantarou said as he took his phone out from his pocket and took a picture of Kaede.

“Gonta thinks so too,” Gonta agreed with Rantarou. “Gonta didn’t even know that you could put makeup on animals.”

“But this isn’t my final touch yet~” Tsumugi said again as she confidently adjusted her glasses. This time she pulled out a measuring tape from god-knows-where.

“Okay what are you gonna do this time?” Rantarou seemed concerned.

“Do I even need to answer that? It’s time for some kitty cosplay!!” Tsumugi cheered.

“Cosplay?!” Gonta was surprised. “You can make animals wear clothes like humans do?!”

“Yes I can. Fu fu fu~”

“Kaede, you’re really okay with this?” Rantarou asked her, being a concerned boyfriend. Kaede only replied with an indifferent meow.

“Akamatsu-san said “whatever”,” Gonta translated her.

“Alright then,” Rantarou gave up. He decided to just take a sip of tea that Kirumi made.

“So does anyone have a suggestion for the cosplay theme?!” Tsumugi yelled so that everyone could hear her.

“Angie wants an animal onesie~” Angie suggested. “Kinda like, you know~. Cat costume~? Or teddy bear costume~? Or pretty much anything fluffy~?”

“That’s... kinda redundant...” Kaito replied her.

“But that would be reeeaally fluffy~!!!” Angie cheered.

“How about a skimpy stripper costume?!” Iruma suggested.

“Iruma-san, please don’t,” Saihara told her.

“What’s your problem, virgin _uke_ detective?!!” Iruma spat on him instead.

“Virgin _uke_ detective?!” Saihara couldn’t believe what he just heard.

“Stay away from Saihara, you slut!!” Maki, out of everyone, unexpectedly defended the detective.

“Shut up, washboard chest!!” Iruma flamed Maki back, even though she was stuttering. “No one asked for your opinion!!!”

Maki didn’t say a word. She just gave Iruma the sharpest glare possible—which was more than enough to make her shriek.

“Harukawa-san, please stop!” Saihara told her.

“T, Tenko doesn’t usually raise her arms against girls, so...” Tenko tried to calm the others down, preparing to fight. “Can Iruma-san and Harukawa-san please... calm down?”

“Tch,” Maki hissed as she looked away from the gaudy-looking inventor girl. Iruma was still shaking on the ground.

“Seriously guys...” Himiko complained again. “I didn’t come here to watch everyone fighting...”

The dressing room became silent for a few moments.

* * *

“Tahaaaaa.....!!!” Kokichi let out a satisfied smile after drinking his grape panta-peppermint tea mix as if to break the silence. Meanwhile Kaito and Saihara gave him disgusted glares.

“Anyway, everyone,” Tsumugi switched back the topic into the original one. “I guess I can start with the cosplay thing now.”

Tsumugi then started measuring Kaede’s sizes and draw the basic pattern on some sheets of paper. “And now time to sew the costume...” she mumbled. “Oh, Akamatsu-san can play with the others while waiting.”

“Alrighty~” Rantarou replied as he caught Kaede that jumped onto him. “Now Kaede, you wanna drink some...”

Rantarou hadn’t finished his sentence when he found out that Ryouma poured the milk into a glass and gave her a bowl of water instead. “Hoshi-kun, what the hell?” he complained.

“This may sound surprising to you, but cow milk is actually bad for cats,” Ryouma said. “Cats are mostly lactose intolerant, so cow milk can make them sick and give them diarrhea.”

“So what can cats drink?” Rantarou asked again.

“Water is enough,” Ryouma answered while giving a bowl of water to Kaede. Kaede then drank the water from the bottle.

“Okay, how about the milk? Should we give it to Ouma-kun so he gets taller?”

“Hey, I heard that!!!” Kokichi complained. “Also Hoshi-chan’s shorter than me, so _he_ should be the one drinking more milk. Let me enjoy my panta in peace, dammit!!!”

“Yeah, but I’m pretty sure Hoshi-kun has a bigger dong than yours!” Rantarou flamed him back. “Maybe milk can also increase dong size?”

Kokichi gasped hysterically, and then he ran into Saihara’s arms while crying. “SAIHARA-CHAAAAN!!!”

“E-eh?” Saihara was dumbfounded.

“Amami-chan bullied me again!!!” Kokichi cried.

“Well you pretty much deserve it,” Kaito told Kokichi. “Don’t sweat it, Saihara.”

Rantarou only gave Kokichi a cynical glare.

“See?!” Kokichi pointed at him.

“Uh, yeah...” Saihara couldn’t really say anything about them.

Kaede, who was still drinking, rolled her eyes as she couldn’t care less about the bickering boys behind her.

“The costumes are now done!!” Tsumugi cheered few minutes later.

“Whoa, that was quick,” Kaito commented.

“That’s SHSL Cosplayer for you~” Angie commented. “Mugi sure can make any costumes real fast~”

Kaede glanced at the dresser. She saw some costumes Tsumugi already prepared for her, such as cat onesie, idol costume, and a princess dress.

“Nyaaa~!” Angie cheered. “Angie wants to paint Kaede with all the cute costumes!”

“Yonaga-san, I think I can just take some photos of her and give them to you,” Rantarou suggested. “Then you can paint from those photos.”

“Good idea~” Angie agreed with him. “But Angie prefers painting from a living sample...”

“Well, Persian cats are fairly docile, so she probably won’t move much when you’re painting her,” Ryouma said.

“Yeah but, I’m not sure if Kaede herself would be okay with sitting for like, two hours in front of the canvas.” Rantarou hesitated. “Also I’m pretty sure it’d be better if you do it in your own pacing, right?”

“Okay...” Angie gave up.

“So what do you guys think?!” Tsumugi passionately showed Kaede off to the rest of the kids. Kaede was wearing a onesie with white synthetic fur and a pair of cat ears on its hoodie. The onesie actually fit to her slender body, making her body parts that weren’t covered in it, such as her paws and her head, looked even fluffier in comparison.

“SO CUTE AND FLUFFY~!!!” Angie screamed. “ANGIE WANTS TO HUG KAEDE UNTIL SHE DIES~!!!”

“Uh, Yonaga-san, please don’t,” Saihara told her.

“Oh yeah, Rantarou would be jealous~” Angie teased him.

Rantarou didn’t even bother to say anything to the bubbly tan girl. He just took some photos of Kaede with his phone.

Right after that, Tsumugi changed Kaede’s onesie with a cutesy, puffy pink dress and a ribbon on her neck with some piano motifs on it. “And there’s also an idol costume!” she cheered again. “Tenko Tenko Teeeen!”

“D, did you just—” Tenko was shook. “Shirogane-san, why did you—”

“Nishishi~ Chabashira-chan would look cute in an idol outfit, wouldn’t she?!” Kokichi teased her.

“STOP IT!!!” Tenko was flustered by his teasing.

After Rantarou took some pictures again, Tsumugi then changed Kaede’s outfit for the last time. “And last but not least, PRINCESS DRESS!!!”

Kaede was wearing another pink dress, but this time it looked more elegant. The dress actually covered up her rear toes. It had some flower ornaments on the waist part and a ribbon on the chest. She was also wearing a tiara and a pink pearl necklace.

“So what do you guys think?” Tsumugi asked everyone else.

“SO BEAUTIFUL KYAAAAAA!!!” Tenko fangirled.

“I SAW A CAT SO BEAUTIFUL I STARTED CRYING???!!!” Kaito was also amazed at her.

“MOMOTA-KUN, DON’T CRY!!!” Gonta tried to calm Kaito down, even though Gonta himself didn’t seem calm either. “IF YOU CRY, GONTA WILL ALSO CRY!!!”

“Shirogane-san, you did a great job!” Saihara complimented the cosplayer instead. “Also, Momota-kun, Gonta-kun, please don’t cry, okay?”

Rantarou was too awed to say anything. He hasn’t done taking pictures yet, but this time his breathing was loud enough for some of the kids near him to hear.

“May I ask what is disrupting you, Amami-kun?” Shinguuji asked him.

“Amami-kun, are you okay?” Saihara was also concerned.

“I’m fine, don’t worry,” Rantarou answered. But then he jokingly said, “I think I’m having diabetes...”

“No, you aren’t,” Kiibo refuted. “According to my scans on your body, your blood sugar is still on the normal level.”

“Ugh...” Rantarou grunted. He face-palmed and massaged his temples as he was baffled with Kiibo’s denseness to the point it gave him headache. He decided to not say anything to the robot because he’s been his classmate long enough to know that any attempt to teach him about metaphors would be pointless.

“Hey, uh, Kiibo-chan,” Kokichi called as he put his hands on Kiibo’s shoulders. Kokichi then leaned closer to Kiibo’s ear and whispered, “Shut the fuck up.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter is basically:  
>  \- 60% pointless bickering  
>  \- 20% shoehorned cat facts from Hoshi  
>  \- 15% shoehorned shippy moments  
>  \- 5% actual cosplaying
> 
> Sorry folks~
> 
> Other than that, I don’t really have anything else to say other than le usual comment-whoring and kudo-whoring smh. Feel free to add comments~


	3. The Holy Sacred Divine Meditation

“So... now what?” Gonta asked to no one in particular.

“Ask Shirogane,” Ryouma answered. “She was the one who gathered us in the backyard in the first place.”

“Well, it ought to be something special enough for all of us to witness together,” Shinguuji said. “Also, what on earth is Momota-kun doing? I wonder...”

Kaito didn’t budge in the slightest. He was focusing at the Saihara and Maki who were busy chatting and laughing together.

“Ah... Gonta gets it!” he said. “Momota-kun is jealous because Harukawa-san and Saihara-kun are having fun without him!”

“I-I’m not jealous!” Kaito tried to deny it despite his apparent stuttering.

“And then there are those lovebirds,” Ryouma pointed at Rantarou and Kaede who were gazing at the night sky together.

Kaede was sitting on the ground. Rantarou was laying down and resting his chin on Kaede’s head, causing her to flinch a bit. “Oh, sorry,” he apologized to Kaede while holding her so she wouldn’t fall off. “On second thoughts, I kinda wanna say thanks to Ouma-kun now,” Rantarou sighed in relief while leaning his head on Kaede’s back. “It’s only a few hours, but it’s been the fluffiest moment I’ve had with you...”

Kaede stared at him in disappointment.

“That was terrible, wasn’t it?” Rantarou sighed.

“Meow,” Kaede nodded.

“Well, Yumeno-san did say that you’ll be back to normal at 3am,” Rantarou said again. “So might as well cherish the moment while I can.”

Rantarou sat on the ground as he lifted Kaede onto his lap and pet her head, causing her to purr in happiness. Kaede curled herself on Rantarou’s lap to relax while wagging her tail. Rantarou smiled at his girlfriend’s antics and continued petting her head. “So cuuute...!” he squealed under his breath.

Without either of them realizing, Kokichi pulled Kaede’s tail by surprise. Kaede was startled and she clawed him.

“Akanyatsu-chan, that hurts!” Kokichi complained. “Also you’re welcome, Amami-chan. Nishishi~”

Both Rantarou and Kaede glared at him. “You _have_ to ruin the mood,” Rantarou nagged.

“Yeah, yeah, sorry for interrupting your honeymoon,” Kokichi shrugged. “Also you two should thank Yumeno-chan as well. She was the one who chanted the spell, after all.”

“Didn’t expect you to remember Yumeno-san,” Rantarou smirked. “Thought you’d want the credits all for yourself.”

“Well, of course I’d remember Yumeno-chan! She’s my future wi...zard, after all.”

“Future wizard?” Rantarou challenged him.

“Yeah! Future wizard! She’s already amazing as a wizard in training, so she’ll definitely be my brilliant wizard in the future!”

“ _Your_ wizard in the future? Does she really have to be _yours_?”

“Yes! You heard that, Yumeno-chan?”

Himiko pretended to be meditating so she wouldn’t have to deal with Kokichi.

“Yumeno-chaaan~!” Kokichi called her again, but Himiko tried her best not to respond.

“Interrupting the holy sacred divine meditation is an action forbidden by God~” Angie replied in Himiko’s stead. “Please refrain from disturbing Himiko. She needs tranquility and inner peace to achieve Nirvana.”

“What the—Nirvana?!” Tenko was shocked. “Are you saying that Yumeno-san is going to heaven?! Is she going to die?! Tenko will not let that happen!!”

“Of course not~” Angie said to Tenko. “A great arch wizard like Himiko won’t die that easily~ She just needs to achieve Nirvana to open her chakras, so she will be an even greater arch wizard~ It’s basically the same thing with Tenko’s aikido training, y’know~”

“Well, uh... i-if it’s a training for Yumeno-san, then... Tenko will support it! As long as it’s for Yumeno-san’s sake!" Tenko said. "Can Tenko also meditate?”

“That’s right~! Tenko can also meditate by herself for spiritual training~ If Tenko opens her chakras, then Tenko can also be an even stronger aikido master~ Kokichi and Rantarou and Kaede can also meditate together with Himiko and Angie~”

“Um, no thanks...” Rantarou refused.

“Eeeeh~?! But the holy sacred divine meditation is really good for spiritual health~!” Angie pouted. “The holy sacred divine meditation can also help Rantarou to clear his mind, so he can do better in exams~ Maybe he can even remember what his SHSL talent really is~ Kaede can also meditate to get more inspirations to compose new songs~ Even an evil person like Kokichi can be purified with the holy sacred divine meditation~!”

“Me? Purified? Pffft! Don’t make me laugh, Angie-chan!” Kokichi bragged. “I’m _proud_ to be evil! I don’t need to be purified!”

“By the way, Angie-san,” Gonta called her. “Is it okay of Gonta also meditates? After hearing what Angie-san said, Gonta thinks that he can be closer to nature by meditating. Maybe meditating can also help Gonta to be a better gentleman.”

“Of course~! Everyone is welcomed by God~” Angie answered.

“Momota-kun, Hoshi-kun, Shinguuji-kun, you three should meditate as well!” Gonta told the other three guys.

“N-nah...” Kaito refused.

“I appreciate you offer, Gokuhara,” Ryouma said. “But no thanks.”

“Well, Gonta won’t force you if you don’t want to...” Gonta sighed and rested himself on the ground.

“I shall meditate with you, Gokuhara-kun,” Shinguuji answered. “I might acquire spiritual peace to hone my talent as a Super High School Level Anthropologist.”

“Thank you, Shinguuji-kun!” Gonta said. “That’s really good of you!”

Gonta, Tenko, and Shinguuji then sat down cross-legged and started meditating.

Maki was listening to Saihara’s mystery stories when she was distracted by the sight of four people meditating together. “...What are they doing?” she asked. “I know they’re meditating, but...”

“Honestly, I don’t know either,” Saihara answered.

“Shuuichi, Maki, you two should do the holy sacred divine meditation as well~!” Angie called them.

“Sorry, Yonaga, but I’m not interested,” Maki refused.

“No offense, Angie-san, but...” Saihara said, but Angie cut his sentence off before he could finish.

“Eeeeh~?! Why not?!” Angie protested. “The holy sacred divine meditaion can help Shuuichi to clear his mind, y’know? A clear and peaceful mind is necessary for a detectitve to solve cases, right~? Maki can also meditate to enhance her motherly instinct as a caregiver~!”

“T-Toujou is the one with motherly instinct, not me,” Maki sulked and fidgeted her hair.

“ ‘S okay, HaruMaki!” Kaito told her. “Shuuichi’s already a good father candidate, so I believe that he’ll help you to develop your motherly instinct further! I’m saying this not only as his boss, but also the future godfather of your future baby!”

“F-future baby?!” Maki was shaking. “D-don’t just decide things by yourself, idiot!”

“By the way, where did Amami-kun and Akamatsu-san go?” Saihara changed the topic.

* * *

“What are ya two lovebirds in mating season doing around here?!” Miu scolded Rantarou and Kaede who were on the balcony.

“Just looking at the sky and stuff,” the green-haired boy answered. “Well, what are _you_ doing here, Iruma-san? Shouldn’t you be helping Shirogane-san and the others with the preparation and stuff?”

“I-I’ve done my part!” Miu answered with a smug grin to hide her stuttering. “K-Kiibo’s taking care of everything else with Four-Eyed Weeb and Maid Hag.”

“Oh,” Rantarou answered.

“ ‘Oh’?! That’s it?! You’re supposed to be more like ‘Whoa, that’s amazing!’ when the beautiful genius inventor Iruma Miu-sama give ya some latest update!!”

Rantarou and Kaede blankly stared at her.

“W-why are ya two staring me like that?!”

The two still stared at Miu.

“S-stop it, ya Avocado Fuckboy!!”

They didn’t stop staring at her.

“I-I was just joking earlier, ‘kay?! I’m sorry!”

“Yeah, yeah, I forgive you,” Rantarou sighed.

“Iruma-san, my preparation has finished,” Kiibo said as he arrived at the balcony.

“O-okay, I’m coming!” Miu answered. “Get it? ‘Coming’. Hyahyahyahyahya...!”

“Please refrain from saying unnecessary dirty things, Iruma-san,” Kiibo warned her. “Amami-kun, Akamatsu-san, you two should gather with everyone else in the backyard as well.”

“Alright, we’ll catch up later,” Rantarou said to the robot.

“Welp, Kiibo and I are gonna go now! Cya~!” Miu said to them and left with Kiibo.

Right after the two left, Kaede yawned and fell asleep while standing on the balcony handrail.

“Whoops,” Rantarou caught her so she wouldn’t fall off. Then, he pulled Kaede into his arms and kissed the top of her head. “Cats _do_ sleep almost all the time, huh?” he giggled.

* * *

Tsumugi and Kirumi couldn’t believe what they saw.

“Ajaraka mokuren kyuraisu tegeretsuno... pa!” Shinguuji chanted.

“Gonta is a gentleman, Gonta is a gentleman, Gonta is a gentleman...” Gonta chanted repeatedly.

“Eeeeeh~?! Angie totally didn’t expect Korekiyo and Gonta to chant their prayers so loudly~!” the religious girl commented.

Tsumugi’s mouth was agape in confusion.

“Me too, Shirogane,” Maki told her before she could say anything.

“Oh, okay,” Tsumugi answered.

“At any rate, I’ve prepared everything we’re going to need for the camping,” Kirumi said while carrying some sleeping bags and firewood, deciding not to bother with the meditiating ones.

“I brought some snacks too~!” Tsumugi cheered and showed off her stash.

“Whoa whoa, firewood? We’re seriously gonna make some campfire?!” Kaito asked.

“Well I _did_ say we were going to go camping,” Tsumugi said again. “But it’s more that just a regular camping!”

“What do you mean by that?” Saihara asked.

“Hm hm hmm...” Tsumugi smirked and adjusted her glasses. “Wait until Kiibo-kun and Iruma-san arrive to find out!”

“Wait a sec,” Kokichi interrupted. “You actually get that dirty shitty uncooperative bitch to help you? What is it for her? Did you offer yourself to be her one-night stand or something?”

“N-No!!!” Tsumugi declined. “I just... I only bribed her with my hentai doujinshis, that’s all!!”

Rantarou who was behind Ryouma spat the green tea he was drinking.

“Amami, when did you get back here?!” Ryouma asked.

“Just now,” Rantarou answered.

“And where did that tent next to Rantarou come from?” Angie asked.

“Oh, I found it in the storage room,” Rantarou answered.

“Um, Angie-san... can I meet favorite anime characters in my meditation?!” Tsumugi asked.

“Of course! Anything is possible with the holy sacred divine meditation~” Angie answered.

“Okay then!” Tsumugi said as she sat down and started meditating with the others.

“Angie will meditate as well~” she said as she followed Tsumugi.

“I still have some other things to do,” Kirumi said as she put down the sleeping bags and firewood she was carrying. “Kiibo-kun and Iruma-san might need me.”

Kirumi then went off to get Kiibo and Miu.

“What are Kiibo-kun and Iruma-san doing, anyway?” Saihara asked right after Kirumi left.

“Dunno,” Kaito shrugged.

“Well, Shirogane did say it’s supposed to be a surprise,” Maki added.

“More that that, Amami,” Ryouma asked him. “Where did you and Akamatsu go to earlier?”

“Well, I was just trying to find a tent for Kaede to stay in,” Rantarou answered. “I also borrowed Shirogane-san's PJs for her. I mean, she’s kinda not wearing anything right now. So if she transforms back into a human when she’s in front of everyone, then things are gonna get... peculiar.”

“I thought you were avoiding Ouma,” Maki joked.

“Yeah, there’s that too.”

Kokichi gasped hysterically. “Did Harukawa-chan just make a joke?!”

“So what if she did?!” Saihara replied. “You’re not the only comedian in our class!”

“Yeah! HaruMaki can’t be a _tsukkomi_ forever!” Kaito added. “She’s gotta be Shuuichi’s _boke_ once in a while!”

“Wait, why am I the _tsukkomi_?” Saihara was confused.

“Because you’re plain and has no humor sense, Saihara-chan,” Kokichi said.

“Oi! Shuuichi does have humor sense, ‘kay?!” Kaito scolded him. “It’s just that Shuuichi and HaruMaki switch turns to be the _boke_ and _tsukkomi_ each time!”

“Stop talking like we’ve been performing manzai since forever!” Maki protested.

“You might want to keep it down,” Ryouma warned them. “If you’re too loud, Yonaga might stop her meditation midway and threaten to curse us again. Not that I believe in curses, I just don’t want to deal with her rubbish any further.”

In the middle of their bickering, a smell of burnt woods emerged all of a sudden. Kaito was the first one to sniff that smell. “Is something burning here?!” he panicked.

“Don’t worry, it’s just Amami-kun starting the campfire,” Saihara reassured him.

“It was kinda getting colder here, so... yeah,” Rantarou said as he put Kaede inside one of the sleeping bags.

“HYAHYAHYAHYAHYAAAA...!!! Miss me, ya small fries?!!” Miu made an entrance with Kiibo and Kirumi following her. Without caring about everyone else’s reactions, she went to see the people who were meditating. “Also what are y’all doing?! Oooooi!”

“I believe that they are meditating, Iruma-san,” Kiibo told her. “Please do not disturb them.”

“Oh. Must be Alolan Lunatic’s idea, huh?” Miu hissed. “Oh well!”

“Moreover, Iruma-san,” Saihara said. “Shirogane-san said that you and Kiibo were going to do something special for the camping. What is it, exactly?”

“Oh! That, huh? Four-Eyed Weeb said that she wanted a camping where everyone can request their own song to listen to, so I installed a jukebox function in Kiibo’s body! Complete with infinite collection of music library!”

_500 yen that most of the songs are pirated_ , Kaito thought.

_Make it 1000_ , Saihara looked at him.

_What the—Shuuichi, you can hear me?!_ Kaito thought.

“The music will pause when I start talking,” Kiibo added. “So you don’t need to worry about missing some parts of the song you were listening nor not being able to talk to me while I’m playing the music.”

“HYAHYAHYA...!!! Amazing, ain’t I?!” Miu bragged. “As expected from the beautiful genius inventor Iruma Miu-sama!!!”

“Then how do we request the song that we want?” Saihara asked.

“Here! I made some control panels for y’all!” Miu said while giving away some things that looked like mini touch screen pads to everyone. “The detailed instructions are all in there! I’m too lazy to explain to y’all small fries ‘cause your shrimp brains won’t understand it anyways!”

“Should we wait until everyone else finish meditating?” Saihara asked.

“Don’t tell me that you actually believe in the curse that she said,” Maki replied.

“Uh, no, I’m just trying to respect other people who are doing their own activities,” Saihara replied.

“Well if we play classic music, they should be fine,” Rantarou suggested, already tampering with his control panel. “I don’t think classic music will disturb them that much.”

“Heh! Ya just want an excuse to hear a piano music ‘cause your girlfriend currently can’t play it, don’tcha?!” Miu hissed.

Rantarou didn’t bother to reply her. He just pressed the play button. Kiibo then transformed himself into a jukebox and _Turkish March_ by Mozart started playing. Rantarou then wrapped himself in his sleeping bag and took some snacks. “It’s catchy, okay?!” he protested.

Before anyone could react, Gonta suddenly stood up and shouted, “YOSH!!”

“What the f—GONTA DON’T SURPRISE ME LIKE THAT!!!” Kaito scolded him.

“S-sorry, Momota-kun,” Gonta apologized. “It’s just that... after meditating, Gonta finally feels closer to the nature, even if it’s just a little bit.  Gonta also feels more gentlemanly now.”

“My meditation is completed...” Shinguuji said. “Yonaga-san was indeed right about the meditation. I feel that my spiritual sense as a Super High School Level Anthropologist has improved.”

“Tenko also feels fresher after meditating!” Tenko said. “Angie-san’s meditation really works!”

“I also feel fresher and more magical!” Himiko said. “I can finally curse Ouma for good!”

“YES PLEASE!!!” Kaito exclaimed.

“Angie has achieved Nirvana again~” Angie said.

_Just how many times she’s achieved Nirvana?!_ Saihara thought.

“I even found out what’s in Eren’s basement!” Tsumugi said.

“Shirogane-san, you’re like 4 centuries late,” Rantarou said. “No one cares about that anymore.”

“Well I do...” Tsumugi sulked. “And the jukebox is already finished! Thanks, Iruma-san!”

“W-well, t-those doujins better be worth it, ‘kay?!” Miu said. “If they suck, then I’ll kick your ass so hard, ya won’t be able to get pregnant!”

“O-okay...” Tsumugi answered.

After that, _What’s New Pussycat_ started playing from the juke box.

_Oi, Momota-kun!_ Saihara glared at Kaito.

_Huh?_ Kaito glared back.

_Don’t tell me you requested to play it 21 times while also adding_ It’s Not Unusual _in between_ , Saihara glared at him again.

_So what if I did?_ Kaito smirked at Saihara.

“Shirogane-san, what’s a... jook box?” Gonta asked.

“Jukebox is basically like a music box but REALLY big. Normal jukebox is operated with coins, but Iruma’s jukebox doesn’t cost any money. It’s operated with this control panel thing instead,” Kaito explained.

“Eeeeh? Momota-chan sure knows a lot about jukebox, huh?” Kokichi sneered. “I wonder how much you wasted to play _What’s New Pussycat_ 21 times in every jukeboxes you find...”

“S-shut up!” Kaito protested.

“Momota-kun, can you please teach Gonta how to use the control panel?” Gonta asked.

“ ‘Kay,” Kaito said. “So you click it here, and...”

Kaito continued to give Gonta the instructions to operate the control panel jukebox.

“...How do you skip songs?” Maki asked after the second _What’s New Pussycat_ started playing.

“Ya can’t,” Miu answered.

“Tch.”

Then _What’s New Pussycat_ played again.

And again.

And again.

And again.

“The song actually fits for Bakamatsu and Avocado Fuckboy ‘cause it’s about flirtin’ with a pussycat! HYAHYAHYAAAA...!!!” Miu joked to brighten the situation.

Rantarou gave a cynical glare at her.

“W-w-what?!” Miu protested. “L-learn to take a joke, will ya?!”

“I should be the one saying that...” Rantarou said.

At some point, the song finally changed into _It’s Not Unusual_.

“...Finally,” Maki sighed in relief.

Not too long after that, _What’s New Pussycat_ played again.

“Oh, come on!!” Maki complained.

* * *

After a seemingly neverending cycle of _What’s New Pussycat_ being repeated, a new song finally started playing.

“ _When I was a young boy... My father took me into the city... to see a marching band..._ ” Saihara sang along with the song “ _He said, ‘Son, when you grow up... would you be the savior of the broken... the beaten, and the damned?’_ ”

“Nishishi~” Kokichi giggled. “Looks like Saihara-chan is still in his phase, after all.”

“It’s not a phase, Ouma-kun! This is who I am!” Saihara cried from the bottom of his lungs. “Okay, where was I? Ehm. _To lead you in the summer... to join the black parade..._ ”

“...He actually doesn’t sound half bad,” Maki complimented.

“Actually yeah,” Kaito replied, already playing air drum before realizing it himself.

“ _And when you’re gone we want you all to know... WE’LL CARRY ON...!!!_ ” Saihara continued singing.

“ _WE’LL CARRY ON...!!!_ ” Kaito sang along, albeit his vocals are rather sub-par in comparison to Saihara. “ _Though you’re dead and gone, believe me,your memory will CARRY ON...!!! WE’LL CARRY ON...!!! And in my heart I can contain it, the anthem won’t explain it!_ ”

“Aaand you ruined it...” Maki complained.

* * *

After Saihara and Kaito finished singing, _Careless Whisper_ ’s saxophone intro started playing from the jukebox.

“Who requested this one?” Shinguuji asked.

“Probably Amami-chan,” Kokichi guessed. “Amami-chan likes to play this song every night, huh? Especially when he’s doing “that” with Akamatsu-chan... Nishishi~”

“Why is _Careless Whisper_ so infamous as a sex song? I don’t get it...” Rantarou complained.

“Amami-kun is right,” Kirumi added. “If you actually understand the lyrics, you would know that the song is about a man who regretted cheating on his partner.”

“It’s the sexy sax, I’m tellin’ ya!” Miu exclaimed.

Ryouma was standing apart from everyone else while looking at the night sky by himself. “Amami wasn’t the one who requested _Careless Whisper_ ,” he said. “I did.”

“Oh...” Kaito was awed.

“So Shirogane-san, how long are we going to do this?” Saihara asked.

“ALL NIGHT LONG!!!” Tsumugi cheered.

“...Eh?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whew, finally after centuries of no update. And next chapter will most likely be the last one, so yeah.
> 
> About Boke and Tsukkomi, both of them are terms in Manzai (Japanese standup comedy where the performers are a duo)—Boke (funny guy) says the joke, while Tsukkomi (straight guy) fixes the dumb things the boke says. In case you don’t know about Manzai yet.
> 
> So... did I overuse the wiggly thing (~) on Angie’s speech?
> 
> Last but not least, I hope you enjoy this fic ^o^


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